The Double-Edged Sword of Perfectionism
Perfectionism often masquerades as a virtue, celebrated in job interviews and on social media. However, the reality can be far from perfect. While a desire for excellence can be motivating, perfectionism often leads to intense stress, procrastination, and burnout. So, what distinguishes healthy ambition from perfectionism, and how can we find a balance?
Understanding Perfectionism vs. Healthy Ambition
Healthy ambition involves setting realistic goals and striving to achieve them without being overly harsh on yourself. Perfectionism, on the other hand, is often rooted in a fear of failure, self-criticism, and an insatiable desire to meet impossible standards. Research by Curran and Hill (2019) has shown a rise in “socially prescribed perfectionism” due to cultural pressures, resulting in people feeling they must meet externally set, often unachievable standards.
Perfectionism can be further divided into different types, including self-oriented perfectionism (setting high standards for oneself) and socially prescribed perfectionism (feeling others expect perfection). These types, particularly socially prescribed perfectionism, have been linked to higher levels of stress, anxiety, and reduced self-esteem (Flett & Hewitt, 2014).
The Psychological Impacts of Perfectionism
Perfectionism often fuels a vicious cycle where striving to be flawless leads to procrastination, which then results in guilt and even higher stress. Studies have consistently linked perfectionism with mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression. A meta-analysis by Limburg et al. (2017) confirmed a strong association between perfectionism and both anxiety and depression, emphasizing how damaging this pattern can be.
Furthermore, the inability to meet one's high standards often leads to negative self-evaluation and reduced self-esteem. According to Frost et al. (1990), this constant cycle of self-criticism can significantly affect one’s mental health, creating a gap between self-image and the idealized self that perfectionists strive to be.
Strategies for Overcoming Perfectionism
1. Reframe Your Goals: Setting achievable, incremental goals helps to break the cycle of unrealistic expectations. Instead of “perfect,” aim for “progress.” Instead of trying to control (or over-control) the outcome, focus on the effort. Research suggests that setting attainable goals helps maintain motivation and reduce the likelihood of burnout (Locke & Latham, 2006).
2. Challenge Self-Critical Thoughts: Perfectionists are often their own harshest critics. Understanding why you are so critical of yourself, and developing a more healthy voice to drive you to achieve is important for breaking this unhelpful habit and sustaining it in the long-term. Working with a clinical psychologist to implement these techniques can provide valuable support.
3. Set Boundaries and Practice Self-Compassion: Giving yourself permission to make mistakes is vital in reducing stress. Self-compassion practices, which encourage kindness towards oneself, have been shown to decrease perfectionistic tendencies and improve mental health (Neff, 2003).
Embracing Imperfection for Better Mental Health
While perfectionism can be a difficult habit to break, adopting more realistic and compassionate approaches to our goals can significantly improve mental health and reduce stress. Remember, the goal isn’t to abandon ambition but to adopt a mindset that values progress over perfection. Consulting with a psychologist or clinical psychologist can also be instrumental in developing healthier habits and improving overall mental health. Contact us today to book in an appointment and find out how we may be able to help you.
References
Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145(4), 410-429.
Flett, G. L., & Hewitt, P. L. (2014). Perfectionism and maladjustment: An overview of theoretical, definitional, and treatment issues. In G. L. Flett & P. L. Hewitt (Eds.), Perfectionism in Perspective (pp. 1-31). American Psychological Association.
Frost, R. O., Marten, P., Lahart, C., & Rosenblate, R. (1990). The dimensions of perfectionism. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 14(5), 449-468.
Limburg, K., Watson, H. J., Hagger, M. S., & Egan, S. J. (2017). The relationship between perfectionism and psychopathology: A meta-analysis. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 73(10), 1301-1326.
Locke, E. A., & Latham, G. P. (2006). New directions in goal-setting theory. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 15(5), 265-268.
Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85-101.
Zeidan, F., et al. (2010). Mindfulness meditation improves cognition: Evidence of brief mental training. Consciousness and Cognition, 19(2), 597-605.